So a few weeks ago, I spoke of Swordfish, the most breathtaking film of 2001, and put forward the idea that making John Travolta a villain is never a bad idea. Which I am very right back.
Last week, a new movie called From Paris with Love was released, and it stars Travolta, and while he’s not a bad guy, he’s not really a good guy either. And he eats scenery like nobody’s business. So, it felt like one of his villainous performances. And that got me thinking…time to make this idea into a law. Nay, a decree!
And so it rang forth on this day, on this website that yea, though John Travolta may make us uncomfortable and yea, though the man did star in the film Wild Hogs, he doth be an adequate, nay, capable, nay again, decent consumer of the scenery when he decides, in his Thetan-mastered wisdom, to purport himself as the “heavy.”
In non-Constitution speak, Travolta can put in a watchable performance when he plays a villain. Be it a flight jockey passed over by the government for a promotion one too many times, a black ops man left twisting in the wind by the government one too many times, or a Wall Street trader whose government betrayed him for political capital, Travolta comes alive with a gun in his hand, a monologue about the ambiguity of our day to days lives, and the director’s instructions to, “be a little nutty in this take.” Filmmakers of the world, you could do far worse than Travolta as your villain. You could, for instance, choose Stephen Dorff. Do you really want to be that guy? Of course not! You want to be the guy who followed in the footsteps of John Woo, Quentin Tarantino, and John Woo again!
As it is written so it is. The JTV Decree of 2010 is now law.
Here’s a taste, for free, courtesy of Youtuber celebrityouthouse who, despite his name, obviously knows his stuff.
Research Assignment: Watch John’s performance in Face/Off when he is baddie Castor Troy. Try not to have your face completely melted by the undiluted awesome he rains down upon you.
I’ll start you off with this clip:
You are welcome.
On an unrelated note, I know several people who read this every week who don’t comment below because, well, the Internet and all that. If that applies to you, feel free to email me at parallax2@juno.com with your comments (and if I get enough, maybe I can do a response column every month or so, like the old days). Also feel free to request me on the old facepage (http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=836564484). Just be sure to say why you are doing so (I read you on Brendan’s blog, for instance) so I don’t ignore it.
“Which I am very right back.”
Is this some sort of hipster speak the kids today are using, or did you mean to say “right about” or something similar?
Oh, and I turned those links into embedded clips. I have no idea why WordPress wouldn’t let you. I’ll try to look into it and get back to you.
Everything I say is some sort of hipster speak the kids are using today. The moment I say it or write or even think it, the youth of America embrace it wholeheartedly. They cannot help themselves.
True dat.
Who dat?
Your mom?
No?
He may be a great villain. But Travolta committed a dumb mistake there. Never, never, never give somebody you might possibly find yourself fighting against a weapon. Its just a bad, bad idea.