[This post was originally published on The Living Room Tumblr.]
BULLETIN – IMMEDIATE BROADCAST
THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN BROOKLYN, NEW YORK HAS ISSUED A
* COMPLACENCY WARNING FOR…
VIRGINIA… COLORADO… MINNESOTA… WISCONSIN… NEW HAMPSHIRE…
* PEPE THE FROG WARNING FOR…
PENNSYLVANIA… MICHIGAN… OHIO… IOWA… NORTH CAROLINA… AND THE SECOND CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICT OF MAINE…
* #FEELTHEJOHNSON WARNING FOR…
NEW MEXICO…
* TACO BOWL WARNING FOR…
NEVADA… ARIZONA…
* HANGING CHAD WARNING FOR…
FLORIDA…
* UNTIL TUESDAY NOVEMBER 8 2016
SITUATION OVERVIEW…
HURRICANE DONALD IS A SERIOUS THREAT TO LIFE, LIBERTY AND PROPERTY, LIKELY TO CAUSE DEVASTATING IMPACTS THAT MAY RENDER THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA UNINHABITABLE FOR AN EXTENDED PERIOD.
POTENTIAL IMPACTS…
A DIRECT HIT BY HURRICANE DONALD WOULD CAUSE WIDESPREAD CATASTROPHIC IMPACTS INCLUDING NATIONAL EMBARRASSMENT, MAINSTREAMING OF BIGOTRY AND MISOGYNY, ENCOURAGEMENT OF POLITICAL VIOLENCE, DEGRADATION OF THE RULE OF LAW, RECESSION, FINANCIAL PANIC, POSSIBLE LOSS OF GLOBAL RESERVE CURRENCY STATUS, CONSTITUTIONAL CRISES, SEVERE DAMAGE TO LIBERAL DEMOCRACY, POSSIBLE COLLAPSE OF THE REPUBLIC, CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY, AND NUCLEAR WAR.
PRECAUTIONARY/PREPAREDNESS ACTIONS…
PREPARATIONS TO VOTE FOR HILLARY CLINTON SHOULD BE RUSHED TO COMPLETION.